Because I didn’t exactly hate “Finding Nemo,” despite its recycling of a plot that’s essentially kept Disney on life support since “Bambi,” and because I found the concept of “Defending Your Life” amusing (yes, I’m an atheist, but it’s a movie), I thought this movie could be funnier than hell. I was born in India, and…
Julian Noble (Pierce Brosnan) finds himself in bed with a woman, and what’s the first thing that comes to his mind? He paints his toenails with her nail polish. As he leaves, he emerges streetside and a kid asks, “Hey mister, is that your car?” Seconds later, the Porsche explodes. The gruff toenail-painter with the porn-stache must be an assassin. And then you…
In 1932, the Windmill Theatre began non-stop variety with their production, “Revuedeville,” inspired allegedly by their Paris namesake, the Moulin Rouge. It’s a historical fact that the Windmill displayed a sign, with pride, that read, “WE NEVER CLOSED,” referring to the fact that they remained open through the London bombings during World War II with the exception of a government-enforced closing from…
“Britain – The Dark Ages,” reads the title card at the beginning of this movie. The Irish, we’re informed, must not be allowed to unite against the Britons, or the Britons will fall. The title cards for the theatrical trailer read, “Before Romeo and Juliet…” I’m certain the only reason they failed to mention this tale predates even…
“Glory Road” opens as though it were Jerry Bruckheimer’s wet dream—a title sequence that plays out like a trailer. Why do we need the flashcards-for-dummies approach? We’re already there, seated. I feel like I’m watching George Bush’s second term sound-bite speeches that, despite two wins, still sound like…